Enslaved By The Bell

Kelly joins the human resistance and leaves her baby brother in the care of Zack and the gang; who proceed to shenanigan the hell out of childcare. Mr Belding has memory loss, as do the lads in today's episode. Episode: "Babysitters"

Zack dresses as a horrible racial stereotype of a Native American, which is bad. Zack then learns to earnestly explore his native roots, which is good? Listen to some white lads from Ireland try to grapple with these questions of identity and fail miserably.  We also talk a bit about Scientology. Episode: “Running Zack”

The gang’s movie project leads to a run in with Clumsy Mulder, and a government conspiracy to find and kill extraterrestrial beings. We delve deep into the troubling light that has been shone on the true nature of Screech and Kevin the Robot and whether or not Neil O’ Neill makes an appearance today. Episode: “Close Encounters of the Nerd Kind”

The gang monetise Lisa's ability to give people advice and set up a phone line and Kelly's little sister has a crush on Zack. Then, unbeknownst to audiences in 1990, the Teen Line was kept alive by our old friends Mullet Mike, Kevin the Robot and Neil O' Neill.Episode: "1-900-CRUSHED"

We were a bit put off by the show's negative attitude towards nerds at the top of this week's episode, but soon forgot that as we were faced by an even bigger, more grotesque fish to fry. This is the episode where the girls are put into a non-consensual swimsuit calendar. Episode: "Model Students"

Twenty years after Jessie chased the caffeine dragon, we are joined by very special guests Tom Maher and Sorcha Ní Lochlainn. Mr Dewey's drug empire, the logistics of singing while doing aerobics, and Rob and Conall take relief in someone else understanding their own perilous addiction to sweet Mother Bayside. Episode (do we even need to say it?): “Jessie’s Song”  

Rob plays his A-game as we thrash out the ethical implications of school beauty pageants. Conall has imbued a few too many glasses of fermented apple juice today.  Mullet Mike also makes his first serious intervention in the Bayside saga. We'll be off next week for Halloween but will be back with "Jessie's Song" ASAP.   Episode: “Miss Bayside”

Peter Morris is clearly lying six feet under a Bayside ditch, because Zack's got a new Dad! This one's a dynamic go-getter eighties computer salesman. Max has seemingly been shown the door, only to be replaced by another waiter with a shtick. We also wonder how much skin to skin contact is necessary to transmit herpes. Episode: "Rent-a-Pop"

Mr Belding’s inter-dimensional war against Zack takes a left turn with the introduction of his niece, Penny Belding. Meanwhile, Rob observes the cunning antics of cut throat teenage millionaire Neil O’ Neill, posing as a harmless extra. And Kelly has a birthday party. Episode: “Blind Dates”

Despite some initial bickering, and an extensive discussion on the past two decades of American Children’s television, Conall and Rob eventually blather on about an episode featuring Bayside’s answer to Oswald Cobblepot, Screech’s Freudian Elvis complex, and Dustin Diamond’s true moment in the sun. Episode: “House Party”

The young blackguards at Bayside High learn how to handle a motor vehicle as Rob and Conall reflect on how they have reached a quarter century without that basic adult skill. Conall notices he’s been piling on the pounds recently and the nature of space and time are once again bent by a Kelly hungry Zack Morris. Episode:  “Driver’s Education”

A couple of self important idiots sit in front of a microphone, and review Saved By The Bell. Episode: "Save The Max"

Luke Maxwell from The Movie Express Podcast wanders into our podcast again to warm up our feeble hearts as the American military struggles to cope with the sudden outbreak of world peace and begins to search for younger cannon fodder in the halls of Bayside High. Telenovelas and AI conspiracies for human extinction also feature. Episode: "Zack's War"

The charismatic sex bomb that is Aonghus Ó Lochlainn returns this week as the gang engage in what is definitely their most terrifying bout of misogyny yet.   Episode: “The Zack Tapes”

We've now traversed the mountain that is Season One of Saved By the Bell, having first waded through the dung pits of Good Morning Miss Bliss. We finally get to put some faces on the spectre that is Valley High as the gang are involved in a prisoner exchange. We're taking next week off but we'll be back on the sixth of September to shove our faces into Season Two. Episode: "Save That Tiger"

This Sunday we witness the fallacy that is the Bayside democratic system. We’re also joined by Big Gus Fun-gus Aounghos Ó Lochlainn. Mr Belding pumps some fantastic Iron and Mr Dewey learns to go deadpan.   Episode: “The Election”

This week the six main characters get fake-married as part of a social studies project consisting of a series of improv workshops. We planned to do two episodes this week, but we ran away with ourselves and ultimetaly that promise (like some of the featured marital promises) was broken. "The Election" is coming up next time! Episode: "The Mamas and the Papas"

Saved By the Bell has truly left the confines of our humble planet as we encounter Kevin The Robot, Gorbachev, satellites and Dustin Diamond's plastic hair-hat. Karl Marx and Ayn Rand clash in an epic middle school startup battle for the ages. Episodes: "Beauty and the Screech," "The Friendship Business"

This week Conall is by the ethereal disembodied voice of a recently deceased Rob, who speaks to us from a booze and hammock filled afterlife. Meanwhile a sentient robot named Kevin takes up residence in Bayside. We'll be back next week with a to the aul episode format.

The lads are noticeably suffering the residual effects of excessive consumption of citric acid today, but their spirits high. Kelly has a independent of Zack and Slater, and learns that homecoming queens can be maroon. Slater learns that tough guys can also make beautiful cakes. We jumped the gun a little bit and thought we we’d a whole extra episode of this podcast.   Episodes: “Cream for a Day” and to the Mat”