Brick House

Rather than thinking that “porn is bad,” maybe it’s more useful to think of it as “bad for your health.” Ben also explores the similarity between healthy activities and recovery activities. Appreciation: local wildlife! (especially chipmunks) Contact Ben or watch the web series http://www.brickhousewebseries.com Help people find it by giving a review or a rating on iTunes! http://bit.ly/1zhJnUj

After a hiatus, Ben Fraser returns to podcasting and reintroduces himself and his perspective on quitting porn. It’s a worthwhile journey! Links: Matt Dobschuetz’s PornFree Radio podcast https://recoveredman.com/024-creativity-and-recovery-with-ben-fraser-creator-of-brick-house/ Unwanted - book by Jay Stringer https://jay-stringer.com/book/ Contact Ben or watch the web series http://www.brickhousewebseries.com Help people find it by giving a review or a rating on iTunes! http://bit.ly/1zhJnUj

Ben is angry today. That’s a trigger, but so is anxiety. Is porn use the best way to deal with these feelings? Probably not. Somatic Experiencing: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Somatic_experiencing Appreciation: Brené Brown https://www.newsweek.com/brene-brown-netflix-special-vulnerability-quotes-ted-talk-call-courage-1400956 Contact Ben or watch the web series http://www.brickhousewebseries.com Help people find it by giving a review or a rating on iTunes! http://bit.ly/1zhJnUj

Ben tells the story of a recent “disaster” at an open mic performance. Rather than being mad about it, he laughed instead. Appreciation: Amazon Alexa Echo Dot. https://amzn.to/2FMl8Vt Watch the web series http://www.brickhousewebseries.com The Brick House Facebook page: https://www.facebook.com/pages/Brick-House/266939153469555 Also, follow on twitter @brickhousetv Or help people find it by giving a review or a rating on iTunes! http://bit.ly/1zhJnUj

God rest ye merry gentlemen Let nothing you dismay Remember Christ our Savior Was born on Christmas Day To save us all from Satan's pow'r When we were gone astray Oh tidings of comfort and joy Comfort and joy Oh tidings of comfort and joy Music this week by Sharon Jones & the Dap Kings “God Rest Ye Merry Gents” https://youtu.be/UewEIBZ7VHM Check out the new movie - “Spider-Man: Into the Spider-Verse” Watch the web series http://www.brickhousewebseries.com The Brick House Facebook page: https://www.facebook.com/pages/Brick-House/266939153469555 Also, follow on twitter @brickhousetv Or help people find it by giving a review or a rating on iTunes! http://bit.ly/1zhJnUj

This week Ben answers a question from a listener (and accountability partner) about ogling. It seems like it can easily be an edging behavior. How can we change that pattern? Appreciations: Dear Sugars podcast about dating an addict https://www.wbur.org/dearsugar/2017/12/02/a-spy-in-the-house-of-love-with-ariel-levy Without Fail podcast interview with Ira Glass about being a mentor. https://www.gimletmedia.com/without-fail/ira-glass Watch the web series http://www.brickhousewebseries.com The Brick House Facebook page: https://www.facebook.com/pages/Brick-House/266939153469555 Also, follow on twitter @brickhousetv Or help people find it by giving a review or a rating on iTunes! http://bit.ly/1zhJnUj

Porn offers the persistent fantasy that women exist in order to please men. But that doesn’t match up with reality very well. Or does it? Watch the web series http://www.brickhousewebseries.com The Brick House Facebook page: https://www.facebook.com/pages/Brick-House/266939153469555 Also, follow on twitter @brickhousetv Or help people find it by giving a review or a rating on iTunes! http://bit.ly/1zhJnUj

It may be that some of the triggers that cause you to act out have to do with major aspects of your life - like relationships and work - and the only solution is to make major changes in the underlying structure of your life. Watch the web series http://www.brickhousewebseries.com The Brick House Facebook page: https://www.facebook.com/pages/Brick-House/266939153469555 Also, follow on twitter @brickhousetv Or help people find it by giving a review or a rating on iTunes! http://bit.ly/1zhJnUj

Every decision you make in your daily life is a vote for the kind of person you want to be - whether it’s an athlete, a musician, or a person with a healthy sexuality. Inspired by James Clear’s book Atomic Habits.https://jamesclear.com/ Matt Dobschuetz Porn Free Radio Podcast: https://recoveredman.com/category/pfr/ Meditation app: Headspace:https://www.headspace.com/ Watch the web series http://www.brickhousewebseries.com The Brick House Facebook page: https://www.facebook.com/pages/Brick-House/266939153469555 Also, follow on twitter @brickhousetv Or help people find it by giving a review or a rating on iTunes! http://bit.ly/1zhJnUj

Ben muses on what it takes to change your habits permanently. What is sustainable and what’s not? Darya Rose Foodist Podcast - ideas about sustainability - https://soundcloud.com/darya-pino-rose/dr-yoni-freedhoff-why-you-must-like-your-life-if-you-want-to-keep-weight-off Darya Rose interview with James Clear - systems are more important than goals. https://soundcloud.com/darya-pino-rose/james-clear-the-4-laws-of-behavior-change Appreciation: Watch the web series http://www.brickhousewebseries.com The Brick House Facebook page: https://www.facebook.com/pages/Brick-House/266939153469555 Also, follow on twitter @brickhousetv Or help people find it by giving a review or a rating on iTunes! http://bit.ly/1zhJnUj

Major events can show us that life is short, and precious. Do we want to spend it pursuing compulsive behavior, or in finding love and compassion with those we are close to? Appreciation: Libby https://meet.libbyapp.com/. Borrow thousands of ebooks and audiobooks free from your library for free. Watch the web series http://www.brickhousewebseries.com The Brick House Facebook page: https://www.facebook.com/pages/Brick-House/266939153469555 Also, follow on twitter @brickhousetv Or help people find it by giving a review or a rating on iTunes! http://bit.ly/1zhJnUj

Ben had a relapse, which is a drag. But what did he learn from it? And what can you learn from his mistakes? Appreciation: Vacations! Take more of them. Watch the web series http://www.brickhousewebseries.com The Brick House Facebook page: https://www.facebook.com/pages/Brick-House/266939153469555 Also, follow on twitter @brickhousetv Or help people find it by giving a review or a rating on iTunes! http://bit.ly/1zhJnUj

This week, Ben talks about a simple strategy to deal with times when your sobriety is more vulnerable. Hint: it may have something to do with connection. Appreciation: Johann Hari’s book: Lost Connections: Uncovering the Real Causes of Depression – and the Unexpected Solutions. http://a.co/0zogguW Watch the web series http://www.brickhousewebseries.com The Brick House Facebook page: https://www.facebook.com/pages/Brick-House/266939153469555 Also, follow on twitter @brickhousetv Or help people find it by giving a review or a rating on iTunes! http://bit.ly/1zhJnUj

If you are an addict, it’s easy to get discouraged that things will never change. Ben Fraser says that change is not only possible, it’s unavoidable. There is hope! This episode was inspired by an Invisibilia podcast. https://www.npr.org/programs/invisibilia/482836315/the-personality-myth Watch the web series http://www.brickhousewebseries.com The Brick House Facebook page: https://www.facebook.com/pages/Brick-House/266939153469555 Also, follow on twitter @brickhousetv Or help people find it by giving a review or a rating on iTunes! http://bit.ly/1zhJnUj

You might think that porn ruined your life. But is it possible that it also saved your life? Ben Fraser explores the impact of compulsive porn use on his early life. Foodist Podcast with Darya Rose https://soundcloud.com/darya-pino-rose/how-to-stop-yourself-from-nighttime-bingeing Appreciation: Science Vs. Guns https://www.gimletmedia.com/science-vs/guns Watch the web series http://www.brickhousewebseries.com The Brick House Facebook page: https://www.facebook.com/pages/Brick-House/266939153469555 Also, follow on twitter @brickhousetv Or help people find it by giving a review or a rating on iTunes! http://bit.ly/1zhJnUj

As Harvey Weinstein goes to court to face charges of rape, Ben Fraser reflects on what meaning the #MeToo movement has for those of us struggling with porn addiction. Tea and Consent: https://youtu.be/oQbei5JGiT8 Slate Interview with Weinstein accusers. https://slate.com/arts/2017/11/harvey-weinsteins-accusers-in-conversation.html Fresh Air interview with Tig Notaro (partly on Louis CK) https://www.npr.org/2018/05/16/611585606/comic-tig-notaro-wants-you-to-know-shes-happy-to-be-here Appreciation: The Hamilton Soundtrack https://soundcloud.com/user-247547064/hamilton-an-american-musical-full-soundtrack Watch the web series http://www.brickhousewebseries.com The Brick House Facebook page: https://www.facebook.com/pages/Brick-House/266939153469555 Also, follow on twitter @brickhousetv Or help people find it by giving a review or a rating on iTunes! http://bit.ly/1zhJnUj

Ben Fraser reflects on how resisting something might actually make us more likely to engage in the behavior, and how to deal with that. Also, are current events triggering you? Appreciation: The Instant Pot! http://a.co/d9DQaNR Watch the web series http://www.brickhousewebseries.com The Brick House Facebook page: https://www.facebook.com/pages/Brick-House/266939153469555 Also, follow on twitter @brickhousetv Or help people find it by giving a review or a rating on iTunes! http://bit.ly/1zhJnUj

In this practical episode, Ben Fraser talks about three tools that have been very useful in his recovery - a filter, meditation, and the FAST check in. A filter that Ben uses: https://x3watch.com/ A meditation app that Ben likes: https://www.headspace.com/headspace-meditation-app F.A.S.T. check-ins. http://recoveredman.com/106-back-2-basics-f-a-s-t-t-check-ins/ Appreciation: Thunderstruck by Erik Larson http://eriklarsonbooks.com/the-books/thunderstruck/ Watch the web series http://www.brickhousewebseries.com The Brick House Facebook page: https://www.facebook.com/pages/Brick-House/266939153469555 Also, follow on twitter @brickhousetv Or help people find it by giving a review or a rating on iTunes! http://bit.ly/1zhJnUj

Ben Fraser discusses how porn is like junk food. Consuming it gives you nothing of value, and is a poor substitute for what you really want. Inspired by Darya Rose’s class on Creative Live called “Lose Weight without Dieting.” https://cr8.lv/2HhJaep Also check out her Foodist podcast. http://www.summertomato.com/podcast And her website, Summer Tomato: http://www.summertomato.com/ Appreciation: Michael Pollan’s book “In Defense of Food.”: https://amzn.to/2JeT0KD Special thanks also to Kevin, Cameron, Thomas and InProgress for encouraging me to podcast again! Watch the web series http://www.brickhousewebseries.com The Brick House Facebook page: https://www.facebook.com/pages/Brick-House/266939153469555 Also, follow on twitter @brickhousetv Or help people find it by giving a review or a rating on iTunes! http://bit.ly/1zhJnUj

It’s easy for a consumer of porn to forget that there is a human being behind the photos and images. And that smile is probably fake. Ben Fraser tells the story of one woman who got involved in the porn industry in the late 70s, and how her life was destroyed by it. This podcast was inspired by an episode of the wonderful podcast: “You Must Remember This” by Karina Longworth. http://www.youmustrememberthispodcast.com/episodes/2017/4/20/dorothy-stratten-dead-blondes-episode-13 A pulitzer prize winning article on this subject from 1980. http://reprints.longform.org/death-of-a-playmate Watch the web series http://www.brickhousewebseries.com The Brick House Facebook page: https://www.facebook.com/pages/Brick-House/266939153469555 Also, follow on twitter @brickhousetv Or help people find it by giving a review or a rating on iTunes! http://bit.ly/1zhJnUj